Focus is… focus? Focus is putting all of your eggs in one basket for a certain amount of time.
Focus is clarity. Being clear about what has to be done, what your direction is, your priorities.
This in turn makes everything linear and one dimensional. Way easier for our minds than multitasking, being bombarded with requests and thinking you have to respond to all of them at once.
Most of the time these requests are not from others. These are conflicting expectations that we impose on ourselves.
But back to focus.
How do you deal with the expectation of your attention so that you get to that zone, that focused, single-minded, one-dimensional space that lets your mind “breathe” and do its best?
Cut all of the expectations that make you feel bad.
If for a reason you think you can’t cut them out, this means they are either very important for you (then you wouldn’t have trouble having them) or they are stacked.
An expectation wrapped within an expectation based upon an expectation.
Simplify and untangle them until you can’t find uncertainty and lack of clarity in the reasoning.
This will explode one expectation into a dozen small ones. But then they are smaller and you can deal with them with ease. Unless you have to untangle again.
Still, when you get to the bottom of it, you’ll have only two choices left: to cut or to follow the expectation.
Cut or follow, there is no safe, self-torture-less middle ground.
Except maybe for meditation.